NOTE: This was originally posted in April 2010, exactly a year before I decided to work in the full-time ministry.
Yesterday, God woke me up at 2:45 AM, with a SINGLE question, “Ria, are you willing to let go of all the plans you have set and let Me do what I want to do in your life?”
Now, before I proceed further, I need to emphasize that I am a planner. I want to accomplish so many things and I set a timeline for each of them. For three different times in three different venues since I became a Christian, I was given the same prophetic word by three different people: God will bless me abundantly so I could be a financial blessing to others.
Naturally, I built my life plans around that promise. I went into the IT industry. I plan to work abroad. I took up MBA so that I have an edge whether in climbing the corporate ladder or in starting a family business. I concocted a business plan with a target opening for late 2010. Everything was laid out and I prayed to God to give me the go signal.
Instead of affirming my plans, He wrestled with me. He does pick out strange hours though =P. And His question really scared me, because it meant seeing my plans crumble down. He’s not telling me He’s taking the promise back, or that all my plans are wrong but He is asking if, when He asks of me to surrender everything to His plans and His timeline, I can let my own plans go.
A UFC match ends with either submission, technical submission, knockout, or technical knockout. A UFC match with God ends successfully for us only when it ends in submission (a fighter clearly taps on the mat or his opponent verbally submits). For me, it ended at 5 AM, after I have let EVERY SINGLE one of my plans go.
And it didn’t end there. At around 9 AM, a friend who is in Japan popped me a message in YM. She said, “God woke me up at around 6 AM (5 AM in Manila) this morning, urging me to pray for you.” He even gave her a word for me, “Therefore the promise comes by faith, so that it may be by grace…” (Romans 4:16).
At times like this, it is both scary and comforting.
It comforts me to know His promise stands and I want to get the promise according to the way He wants me to. For God, the process is as important as the end goal. In our lives, it has to be His way because any other way will not lead to the full life He has in store for us.
However, it is scary, because everything suddenly became fuzzy. He didn’t even tell me His plans. He just asked of me to seek and ask Him about it everyday, until it becomes clear =).
Wow, this life is REALLY exciting!
He (Abraham) went out, not knowing where he was going. –Hebrews 11:8